[r3dtaile] SnowDragon01 - Main and probably rp

[Snowdragon01]

BYOND account and character name: SnowDragon01 (Character name?)

Banning admin: redtaile

Ban type/duration (where you are banned from and for how long): Permanently

Ban reason: (MANUAL BAN) Permaban. Resorted to immediately batonning a head of staff [Quartermaster] as a warden upon the QM entering a cell with a detained , therefore harmless, prisoner. Did not try and communicate first and this was during a rev round. Disconnected during an attempt at working out a metagrudge through ahelps. Made no attempt at communicating why they were leaving. They were even refusing to work out the grudge which is unacceptable due to both players playing important station roles. Their note history has shown a blatant disregard for trying to work things out diplomatically and several poor escalations. They have not shown any attempt at improving their behavior based on note history.

Your side of the story: There was meta grudging going on and i'm sorry. I was actively looking for anything to report to the admins about the said player at the time and the below event was it.
The baton thing was actually an accident. I was the warden during a rev round and I thought a rev had gotten into the security wing and was about to break a prisoner free. I only hit them once before noticing it was a head of staff, said sorry and then they restrained me, stripped me naked, spaced every single item I had and threw me into the hallways without an id. Essentially the QM demoted me.
My reaction wasn't nice and we argued a lot in chat and with the admins. He ended up with a 3 day ban, I ended up with perma.
When I left without notice even though I it was going to be a perma I just had to cool off. Not saying that was right thing to do without notice.

Why you think you should be unbanned:
In the past i've held a lot of grudges and last time was no different. Over the time of being banned I realized that every time I start playing this game, regardless of where i'm at, if i'm in a certain server to long I eventually find someone to metagrudge. That's not right and i'm sorry for doing that. I'm also sorry for anyone i've done that to.
I've been working on this for a while now and realize this needs to stop. I've been trying to forgive people of anything wrong they have done to me or someone else and to stay out of forum arguments. I used to relentlessly argue people no matter where, forums, in game or in real life and I can be quite mean while doing so, haven't been doing that at all recently.
Also sorry for how rude I was that day, the admins had so much patience with me that day it's unbelievable, thank you.
Now I don't know his discord name but if you have it I can provide proof to this. After we were both banned he ranted at me for a while and after cooling off apologized. I did as well and told him that the baton incident wasn't on purpose.
I've improved and if you let me back on i'll happily play without meta-grudging anyone and generally try to be a nicer birb. Also... since I can't properly escalate a fight I generally won't get into one unless the other player is valid or they attack me first and keep attacking. Also it is just a game, no reason to be emotionally attached to your character, they literally respawn next round it's not like 1 life forever with them.

So whaddya say, let's have this be the first sign of improvement and soon followed by action.

[derkuleen]

In the past certain players with a long history with the server were allowed to return under probation, sometimes to RP if they had history on main, to show they had a chance to grow and improve from their past transgressions. I dont really see why this would be any different. Naturally you would be on thin ice and need to show that you had no intentions of doing the same as before, but I personally think the more birds the better! I also know that its been a while since the ban so perhaps its time to open the window to chance? If others actually hop on this and post a reply then we can get an idea of what the consensus would be, if its more negative than positive perhaps a server voucher from another server would be needed.

[Izzy]

Have you been playing on any other servers since the ban? I ask, to see if there's anyone we can ask for a reference, to just make it easier for us to accept that we won't see another repeat.

[Snowdragon01]

Sadly no since i've actually not even touched this game since the ban.

All I can say is i've used to take this game way to seriously and wanted to play by what I thought was right even if the rules or admins thought differently. Essentially just playing on a different rule set than others which over my time leaving i've realized.

I've used to have the "admins were always in some way wrong and I was right" mentality. If making this post shortly after being banned (within a month) it would've been passive aggressive and not entirely sorry for what happened. There would've been something I would stubbornly defend was ok.

You don't see that here, I admit fully that I was wrong and i'm sorry for my actions. It's not right to take jim or bob and fight them over a insult, which usually resulted in murder. Not everyone has to be one upped or have a grudge against that slowly builds and then explodes.

[Trojan_Coyote]

Without having played at all since your ban, I'm very much opposed to you coming back, even under probation right now. If you can play for a while on another server without incident, i would be willing to reconsider.

[Ragolution]

Knowing you, you've done this stuff before. What guarantee do we have you wont just do the same shit all over again?

[Snowdragon01]

Unlike before I'm admitting that this is a problem that needs to stop. Most of the time, when it involved other people, it was always blamed on them and only them. Didn't matter what an admin said, it was always the other persons fault. Now is different, you see i'm finally admitting that I did metagrudge in this situation and made the wrong choices.
Was it a good idea to baton a head of staff? No and it was a mistake since I didn't realize it at the time. Did my past history and recent events make this look like it was an act of metagrudge(even though it wasn't)? Yes.

Besides some misinterpretations of rules my only other repeating offence was "poor escalation." That's easy to solve and you can see how it was by looking above but basically it's to not get into fights unless the other person is valid or won't let me escape. I just don't get the escalation rules, apparently you can't start a fight with another person even if it's just a fist fight. Unless the other side runs away it has to be assumed they're trying to put you intoa critical state, which if you start one and win (they didn't run away) apparently that's breaking the rules. So imo this entire rule set is just broken and something I need to stay far away from. (Like your not going to stop midfight and type I win or something longer, it's going to be crit or stam crit.)

If it's not enough I can understand but these are just some signs to show you that I wont do the two mentioned things got me banned in the first place. Will I never make a mistake again? No, there will be times that I may have mistakenly done something wrong and that's fine.

Of course this isn't something i'll do if the answer is no (and it hurts more by saying it) but it's literally easier to just create a new account and ban evade than to apply for a ban lift in the first place. It's easy to do (I know what byond does to try and keep you banned) and if what I said is true than you'll never notice. My main characters story has been done for a while now and setting up cargo engines isn't really entertaining anymore.
Theres more reason to evade than to not actually. Could've never posted this and got rid of that giant history of never forgiveness and various accuracy.

Look I agree that I need a witness from another server but i'm not going to play on other servers, I don't care about them and its a waste of time. Unless you want to ask about my behavior on the minecraft server than there really is are no witnesses. What will probably happen is that this is denied (especially since I told you no I won't get a vouche) and i'll move on with my life from this server.
Also rago I can't help but feeling your only here because of our past history with each other. But if not whatever, just waiting for the final answer.

[Ragolution]

As your lawyer, I will say that telling the admins that it's 'easier to ban-evade' is not a smart idea.

At the same time, I believe in your ability to be a better human being, because you oftentimes showed it when I granted you leniency. You just need to take it that one step further.

My opinion will never matter on appeals, but if I had a say in this one: I would give you this chance to prove yourself, one last time. And you know how rare it is for me to give people second chances. Sometimes our emotions march at us from across the dells, but we can never let them conquer who we are; Thinking, rational beings. Being aware of one's own flaws and failings is crucial to taking steps to correct them. The narcissist will never admit he is fallible- he will apologize with no substance. Platitudes and pleasantries and "I wont do it again."

I do not have respect for Narcissists. I have respect for those people who are willing to be introspective and say "Maybe I should change this". Those who apologize and identify that they have done something culpably wrong. And I would appreciate if you didn't lash out at people who asked questions.

You have my undue, unwavering and unquestionable support.

SS13 is a stifling environment, and Citadel is no exception. Would you really return, in the event you were unbanned? What you do from here is up to you, but closure will be healthier for your mind.

[Redtail]

My apologies for taking this long to get to this. It was unintentionally one of those things that slipped through the cracks and I apologize again. I know I looked at this when you made the appeal, and probably just got busy at the time and was unable to respond

So, we have a protocol for these sorts of things. Get a vouch from a respectable server, after a significant time investment, showing your good behavior, and I will happily be able to better consider lifting this ban. However, due to the fact you've lacked a vouch, and haven't even /touched/ space station 13 since the ban, I am unable to lift this ban at the present time. Please play on a respectable server, and get a vouch from an admin there.

Respectable servers include: TGstation, bay, aurora, vorestation, goonstation, CM, paradise.

You can say that you've changed all you want, however anyone can say they've changed. We need tangible proof of your improved behavior to support your appeal in the future. Goodluck, and I hope you won't give up on this game.